Well done, me! The scale showed me down a pound this week. More importantly I'm feeling stronger, optimistic, and in control.
Thanks to a Costco run, I made sure the house was stocked with good things for me to eat. My meals this week were heavy on berries & salad, and a new favorite of mine: Baja Veggie Burgers by Golden. Dear me, they are delicious! No bun needed, just a little Wholy Guacamole and these burgers are perfect! I even learned that guac, used in moderation, is an awesome salad topper. Guacamole w/o chips -- who knew? Well I know now!
I think this is the biggest reason I got the scale to move down again this week -- I measured my portions and looked up/wrote down calorie counts for everything I ate. I finally found a notebook I like to use (a steno pad), which helps a lot.
This is what really brought a smile to my face. I did my 5k training 4 days this week, even jogging in these sauna-like days. When I was stretching after this morning's work, I noticed that the sunlight shimmering in the sweat on my arm reminded me of the path that leads to the sun as it sets beyond Lake Erie. I really loved that.
Yesterday alone I swam, biked, walked, and lifted weights. I accept the fact that I'll never be the first to finish any race. I'm finally happy with being a workhorse, knowing I won't quit.
So that's it. That's how my week went. Lots of sweat, healthy food every day, a couple afternoons when I crashed into a battery-recharing naps.
I'm excited that I lost a pound, happy that I enjoyed eating well, proud of all the physical work I did, and I'm looking forward another good week.
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
I hardly know where to begin. I've been thinking a lot lately about how proud I am of some accomplishments of late:
* resuming weightlifting
* overcoming (w/ the help of a friend) a panic attack during Saturday's jog
* doing every single piece of 5k training homework
* tracking everything I eat -- not just the food, but the calories, too
* giving myself a day of no tracking and a little leeway in eating
I'm being hard on myself too:
* I haven't braved a swim suit yet this year, even when the air was stifling and the water was enticing
* I abhor everything I see in the mirror (sooner or later you have to look, even if it's just when washing your face -- and I'm not happy with any of it)
* I'm assuming that my appearance affects my hirability.
Today I feel like I'm paying my debt to society: I paid the fat tax for an upcoming flight. Upon reading that one must fit entirely between arm rests 17" apart, I thought I'd better take a look. It's not easy measuring oneself w/ a ruler, let me tell you. I layed it across my lap, I sat on it, I stood with it. No matter the position, the numbers were clear: either book a second seat for myself or half of my body was going to have to stay home.
I have to write this, I have to put it out there. I have to use this motivation. No matter what I've done, I can't stop. I still have so much physical and mental work to do. I can lift all the weights I want and walk a thousand miles, but if I'm winded from jogging or going up and down the stairs a few times, how in shape am I?
I'm proud and relieved that, for now anyway, I've got a good handle on healthy eating. I'm going to need that because I've got a monumental goal ahead of me, and I'm going to have to learn to push myself through self-consciousness & panic attacks & public perception.