It would seem that though I've learning to deal with daily emotional eating issues, I still haven't mastered the ability to overcome it entirely. For the past week or so my eating hasn't been bad, but I haven't been able to get myself to track – I've actually stopped in the middle of tracking! My daughter leaves today for a weeklong overseas visit with relatives. As the one staying behind, it's ironic that I'm carrying more baggage than all the people on the plane combined! I've got all sorts of childhood abandonment issues; I'm worried about inappropriate airport security pat downs on my little girl and I'm worried that in our world of terror levels my little one might fall as an innocent victim of someone's blind hate; I'm worried that my youngest daughter will miss her big sister and that my son will feel jealous (though he went last year); I'm worried about what to do with my kids during spring break next week and how to keep my eating on track; I'm worried because freelance work has been nonexistent of late but bills have not; I'm worried because high school is just a couple years away for our eldest and preschool is just a couple months away for our youngest.
What's a person to do with such worry? I'm grateful that I've got weightlifting today – that will help focus my runaway thoughts. I'll publicly wish a very happy birthday to my sister and tell her I'm proud of her (Happy birthday, Kirs! I'm proud of you!). And I'll take a box or two of tissue with me for the drive to the airport. And I'll turn the negatives (my son will feel jealous) into positives (I get to spend extra time with my son who's getting older by the minute). And I'll track my food for the entire time my daughter's gone.
~Karin
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