There came a point last evening when I thought to myself, "If there were brownies in the house right now, I'd eat them." I wasn't hungry, I was upset and looking for the comfort which thick chewy brownies can bring. Fortunately for my weight loss efforts, I know better than to keep brownies in the house and I wasn't about to take the time to make them. My taste buds were on sweet alert though, so I grabbed a slice of watermelon.
One of the first instructions I received from Weight Watchers was that I needed to do a cupboard makeover: get rid of red light foods or trigger foods, foods which I felt I had no control over. Doesn't that sound weird? Food I have no control over. I mean, come on, it's just a bag of chips in the cupboard or a peanut butter cookie sitting quietly in the cookie jar.
Food can't do anything to me, it have no life, no consciousness, no movement. And yet there are times when I feel so overwhelmed by what's happening in and around my life that I empower food, bestowing on it the task of comforting me. When there's a food-related event on the horizon, say a birthday party or a dinner out, I get so excited by the anticipation of a change of pace that I start the celebrating early. I munch away up till the event, which then becomes anticlimactic. Often, by the time the celebration rolls around I've had such a feast for myself that I have no choice but to follow the Weight Watcher's theology that celebrations are about people, not about food.
Ridiculously, in writing this blog I've just realized that I've been subconsciously doing things backwards. When I think of brownies, I imagine having my friends around, playing games, laughing, enjoying company. And yet it's not eating that magically summons people. If, in my upset yesterday, I'd eaten brownies, I would have been no less upset. Those things which were bothering me would still exist. Sure, I would have messed with my brain chemicals, releasing some happy hormones, but when those wore off I'd have consumed calories, made my weight loss goal that much farther to reach, spiked my blood sugar, and ended up feeling even more upset.
Huh.
~Karin
No comments:
Post a Comment